Principle 25: Ask Questions Instead of Giving Direct Orders

No one likes to take direct orders. Asking questions help people to feel that they are a part of the decision-making process, improve buy-in and can stimulate creativity.

No one likes to take orders. What if, instead of telling people what to do, we gave them the opportunity to do things themselves, to learn from their own mistakes?

Instead of saying "Do this" or "Don't do that," we should more often say, "You might consider this," or "Do you think that would work?"

We long remember brash orders we've been given, times we've been screamed at - even if they were done to correct a bad error. But if we ask questions that give people the opportunity to correct errors themselves, we save their pride and give them a feeling of importance.

Asking questions also stimulates creativity, leading to new ideas and better solutions.

Practice Principle 25

Next time you are about to give an order to a child, spouse, or employee, resist the temptation to simply tell them what to do. Ask them questions that will help bring them to the conclusion that that is the best action to take, and will make them want to do it.